Does Feminism Teach Us to Be Discontent?

I recently read an article in April's "More" magazine written by Naomi Wolf that is very thought-provoking! Evidently, according to recent studies, women are seen as being less happy now than they were 40 years ago. In the study, a parallel is drawn between the feminism movement and the fact that women have become dissatisfied with their lives.

Wolf states that women in Manhattan view happiness to be old-fashioned. "There are women who have everything that feminism, Western culture and consumer society define as highly valuable: income; choices; stylishness; fascinating, high-status work; rich and equitable, if demanding, family lives. Yet among themselves the question 'How are you?' is almost never followed by 'Great.'" Instead, their answer invariably lists what's wrong - too busy, workload too heavy, too tired, you name it. If a woman expresses contentment in these circles, her friends might be puzzled, pitying, or even think her foolish! It just isn't hip to be happy.

Have our feminist mothers taught us to be discontent? Wolf talks about two different waves of feminism - the first wave comprised the suffragettes: "hardworking, and frustrated, but their letters do not show them unusually dissatisfied in their personal lives." They thought more about justice than their individual rights.

The second wave of feminism comes from an individualistic approach, and this is where the discontent creeps in. After the second world war, after helping the country through a labor shortage, educated women were sent back home to their loads of laundry and housework - they found themselves silently asking, "Is this all?"

Fast forward a generation or two, and the 1980's and 90's saw highly individualistic thinking among women. Any hinderance to becoming totally equal to men was shunned, and out came "newly self-asserting, newly enfranchized women - who increasingly had their own money to spend..." With markets for anything a woman would want to buy, achieve, or do, why would we be dissatisfied?

Wolf's article goes on to draw its own conclusion, but it has gotten me thinking. Does highly individualistic thinking lead to discontent? If we are fighting so hard for something we view as essential to attain, does it make us unhappy in the process? If achieving happiness means never having any problems - a continual life of ease and pleasure - then happiness can never be achieved. Even if we do have a stretch of "ease," in our lives, do we really enjoy that moment as much if we don't have the hardship against which to contrast it?

As wise women, we maintain delicate balancing acts. Whether we are balancing the demands of a busy family, a high-pressure job, school, volunteer positions, you name it, our world today is over-full. Finding balance in the present is what it all boils down to; that is what I strive for and I challenge you to do, too.